856) Perhaps I'm old and tired, but I always think that the chances of finding out what really is going on are so absurdly remote that the only thing to do is to say hang the sense of it and just keep yourself occupied.
Douglas Adams The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (1979) posted by Todd E Van Hoosear [UAQ] (5/5/95)
857) There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovered exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instanstly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarrely inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
Douglas Adams The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy (radio program, 1978) [YQ] posted by Todd E Van Hoosear [UAQ] (5/5/95)
858) In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is.
unknown posted by Todd E Van Hoosear [UAQ] (5/5/95)
[Note: This is often attributed to Yogi Berra, but it is not listed in the authoritative reference for Yogi-isms, The Yogi Book (1998), nor does it sound very much like something Yogi would have said. Wikiquote gives an attributon to Jan L. A. van de Snepscheut, a computer scientist and educator, but cites no source. Other attributions on various websites are to Chuck Reid and Richard Moore.]
859) Nothing is like it seems, but everything is exactly like it is.
unknown posted by Todd E Van Hoosear [UAQ] (5/5/95)
[Note: This is another quote often attributed to Yogi Berra but not listed in The Yogi Book (1998), nor does it sound like Yogi: it's too knowingly ironic. I've been unable to find another attribution.]
860) Our imagination is stretched to the utmost, not, as in fiction, to imagine things which are not really there, but just to comprehend those things which are there.
Richard Feynman Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman! (1985) posted by Todd E Van Hoosear [UAQ] (5/5/95)
861) God not only plays dice, he also sometimes throws the dice where they cannot be seen.
[Note: cf. #197 Einstein. The quote as given here is a slight paraphrase of the original from a 1994 lecture with Roger Penrose sponsored by Princeton University Press. As given by Wikiquote, the original is:
So Einstein was wrong when he said "God does not play dice". Consideration of black holes suggests, not only that God does play dice, but that He sometimes confuses us by throwing them where they can't be seen.]
862) Maybe this world is another planet's Hell.
Aldous Huxley (widely attributed) posted by Todd E Van Hoosear [UAQ] (5/5/95)
863) What is called a sincere work is one that is endowed with enough strength to give reality to an illusion.
Max Jacob Art Poetique (1922) posted by Todd E Van Hoosear [UAQ] (5/5/95)
864) I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.
Garrison Keillor (widely attributed) posted by Todd E Van Hoosear [UAQ] (5/5/95)
865) The philosophers of the Middle Ages demonstrated both that the Earth did not exist and also that it was flat. Today they are still arguing about whether the world exists, but they no longer dispute about whether it is flat.
Vilhjalmur Stefansson The Standardization of Error (1928) posted by Todd E Van Hoosear [UAQ] (5/5/95)
866) Reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.
Jane Wagner The Search for Signs of Intelligent Life in the Universe (one-woman show, 1985) spoken by the character "Trudy," played by Lily Tomlin posted by Todd E Van Hoosear [UAQ] (5/5/95)
[Note: Often attributed to Lily Tomlin, who performed in the one-woman Broadway show written by her writing partner and life companion, Jane Wagner.]
[UAQ] - Usenet alt.quotations newsgroup [WQ] - Wikiquote [YB] - The Yogi Book (1998) [YQ] - The Yale Book of Quotations (2006)
Note: "3089/898" is the designation I've given to the project of posting all my collected quotes, excerpts and ideas (3089 of them) in the remaining days of the Bush administration (of which there were 898 left when I began). As of today, there are 654 days remaining in the administration of the worst American President ever.
hostile to science
lacking in empathy
lacking in public spirit
out of control
Thanks to: Breeze, Chuck, Ivan Raikov, Kaiju, Kathy, Roger, Shirley, S.M. Dixon
i've got a little list...
Steven Abrams (Kansas BofE)
Howard Fieldstead Ahmanson
Roger Ailes (FNC)
Alan Bonsell (Dover BofE)
Bill Buckingham (Dover BofE)
George W. Bush
Bruce Chapman (DI)
The Coors Family
William A. Dembski
Leonard Downie (WaPo)
John Gibson (FNC)
Fred Hiatt (WaPo)
James F. Inhofe
Philip E. Johnson
by Joel Pelletier
(click on image for more info)
Stephen C. Meyer (DI)
Judith Miller (ex-NYT)
Sun Myung Moon
Elspeth Reeve (TNR)
Martin Peretz (TNR)
Richard Mellon Scaife
Susan Schmidt (WaPo)
John Solomon (WaPo)
Richard Thompson (TMLC)
Bob Woodward (WaPo)
All the fine sites I've
Be sure to visit them all!!
Arthur C. Clarke
Daniel C. Dennett
Philip K. Dick
Stephen Jay Gould
"The Harder They Come"
Ursula K. LeGuin
The Marx Brothers
Michael C. Penta
Michael Powell & Emeric Pressburger
"The Red Shoes"
"Singin' in the Rain"
Talking Heads/David Byrne
Hunter S. Thompson
"2001: A Space Odyssey"
If you read unfutz at least once a week, without fail, your teeth will be whiter and your love life more satisfying.
If you read it daily, I will come to your house, kiss you on the forehead, bathe your feet, and cook pancakes for you, with yummy syrup and everything.
(You might want to keep a watch on me, though, just to avoid the syrup ending up on your feet and the pancakes on your forehead.)
Finally, on a more mundane level, since I don't believe that anyone actually reads this stuff, I make this offer: I'll give five bucks to the first person who contacts me and asks for it -- and, believe me, right now five bucks might as well be five hundred, so this is no trivial offer.