927) To succeed in the other trades, capacity must be shown; in the law, concealment of it will do.
Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) "Pudd'nhead Wilson's New Calendar" in Following the Equator (1897) [CQ] posted by jr3000 [UAQ] (5/20/95)
928) [T]he departmental interpreters of the laws in Washington ... can always be depended on to take any reasonably good law and interpret the common sense out of it.
Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) Unmailed letter to H. C. Christiancy (12/18/1887) [TQ] posted by jr3000 [UAQ] (5/20/95)
929) The law in its majestic equality forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.
Anatole France (Jacques Anatole Francois Thibault) Le Lys rouge (The Red Lily) (1894) [ODQ/B16] posted by firstname.lastname@example.org [UAQ] (5/20/95)
930) I know no method to secure the repeal of bad or obnoxious laws so effective as their stringent execution.
Ulysses S. Grant Inaugural Address (3/4/1869) [ODQ] posted by jr3000 [UAQ] (5/20/95)
931) The law is a bum profession. It is utterly devoid of idealism and almost poverty stricken as to any real ideas.
Clarence Darrow (attributed) posted by jr3000 [UAQ] (5/20/95)
932) There was once a professor of law who said to his students. When you are fighting a case, if you have facts on your side hammer them into the jury, and if you have the law on your side hammer it into the judge. But if you have neither the facts nor the law, asked one of his listeners? Then hammer the hell into the table, answered the professor.
W. Somerset Maugham (attributed) posted by jr3000 [UAQ] (5/20/95)
[Note the following e-mail from Fred Shapiro (5/25/95), editor of The Oxford Dictionary of American Legal Quotations:
This is an old joke rather than a quote likely to have an identifiable originator. In the Oxford Dictionary of American Legal Quotations, I have the following:
The young lawyer asked, "But what do you do when both the law and the evidence are against you?" "In that case," replied the old lawyer, "give somebody hell. That'll distract the judge and the jury from the weakness of your case."*
A Treasury of American Anecdotes 10 (B. A. Botkin ed. 1957)
* The same joke, with the punchline "pound on the table and yell like hell," appears in Carl Sandburg's poem, The People, Yes, 1936, in Complete Poems of Carl Sandburg 439, 551 (1970)
The only reason I didn't give the Sandburg quote was I would have had to pay money for permission fees.]
Note: "3089/898" is the designation I've given to the project of posting all my collected quotes, excerpts and ideas (3089 of them) in the remaining days of the Bush administration (of which there were 898 left when I began). As of today, there are 634 days remaining in the administration of the worst American President ever.
hostile to science
lacking in empathy
lacking in public spirit
out of control
Thanks to: Breeze, Chuck, Ivan Raikov, Kaiju, Kathy, Roger, Shirley, S.M. Dixon
i've got a little list...
Steven Abrams (Kansas BofE)
Howard Fieldstead Ahmanson
Roger Ailes (FNC)
Alan Bonsell (Dover BofE)
Bill Buckingham (Dover BofE)
George W. Bush
Bruce Chapman (DI)
The Coors Family
William A. Dembski
Leonard Downie (WaPo)
John Gibson (FNC)
Fred Hiatt (WaPo)
James F. Inhofe
Philip E. Johnson
by Joel Pelletier
(click on image for more info)
Stephen C. Meyer (DI)
Judith Miller (ex-NYT)
Sun Myung Moon
Elspeth Reeve (TNR)
Martin Peretz (TNR)
Richard Mellon Scaife
Susan Schmidt (WaPo)
John Solomon (WaPo)
Richard Thompson (TMLC)
Bob Woodward (WaPo)
All the fine sites I've
Be sure to visit them all!!
Arthur C. Clarke
Daniel C. Dennett
Philip K. Dick
Stephen Jay Gould
"The Harder They Come"
Ursula K. LeGuin
The Marx Brothers
Michael C. Penta
Michael Powell & Emeric Pressburger
"The Red Shoes"
"Singin' in the Rain"
Talking Heads/David Byrne
Hunter S. Thompson
"2001: A Space Odyssey"
If you read unfutz at least once a week, without fail, your teeth will be whiter and your love life more satisfying.
If you read it daily, I will come to your house, kiss you on the forehead, bathe your feet, and cook pancakes for you, with yummy syrup and everything.
(You might want to keep a watch on me, though, just to avoid the syrup ending up on your feet and the pancakes on your forehead.)
Finally, on a more mundane level, since I don't believe that anyone actually reads this stuff, I make this offer: I'll give five bucks to the first person who contacts me and asks for it -- and, believe me, right now five bucks might as well be five hundred, so this is no trivial offer.